mommy underground (mu), the bimonthly newsletter with the balls (err, should we say tits?) to give you motherhood in the real. No fluff. No superficial expectations. Just raw truths to demystify what motherhood entails. Expect humor, snark, and a little groveling.

Featured articles for each issue are posted online. Subscribers can receive the full newsletter via email by subscribing here (Yahoo! Groups) or send a blank e-mail to mommy_underground-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

*Hey, don't worry, subscriptions are free. You just have to sign-up for a Yahoo account.

  mu :: vol 1 :: issue 2 :: Toys that keep Moms Happy The television is my friend. --GASP-- You LET your child watch it? Hell YEAH! Regularly. I won't defend my position for a variety of reasons that all revolve around the fact that you don't live my life, or my child's, nor did you work from home with a child. BUT, I will say this. It doesn't kill any more brain cells than say, Dum Dum suckers and white sugar?

But, as mothers, we let our children do a lot of things so we can catch a break. So why do we beat each other up about it? I mean, we need to survive has humans--we eat what we shouldn't sometimes, we might even have a drink or three, and we definitely obsess over the smallest of details when raising our children.

So here is a list of 5 "toys" that can give you a good 15 minutes of time to yourself--to say--go bathroom by yourself, or maybe even enjoy a chapter of your favorite book:

1) Television. Yes-- try Baby Einstein, Thomas the Tank Engine, Sesame Street, Oswald, JoJo--anything on Noggin, Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network, or Disney that strikes your fancy.

2) Drawing/Painting -- Try the WASHABLE markers, crayons, and YES THEY HAVE THEM paints. These will make your day. Sit the wee little one down, put paper all over in front of them and let them have at it. Even one drawing utensil can keep them busy for hours. I realize that this does not work for little, little ones that like to say EAT crayons--but hey, maybe you can get them the plastic look-a-like pens and let them chew on it for a while? It might give you time to take a short phone call right?

3) Water Bottles. Empty or Full it doesn't matter (just make sure the full ones are closed tightly). Every kid I know loves to hold them, squeeze them, throw them, and just plain chew on them. What's a little plastic for the immune system?

4) Cell phones or remote controls. Yep. Get real ones, old ones, toy ones--whatever you can get your hands on. Because, really, these can be a life saver say when you are on the toilet doing your thang... well, when little one wants to be held and you are otherwise...err... busy. Give 'em the phone. It makes noises, lights, up-- and hey it is more entertaining than the box of tampons. Well, that might be another idea wouldn't it?

5) Pots and Pans. Yep... let that kid bang, clang, twist, turn, stack, and swat away. It will only encourage helping out in the kitchen right?



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What's in Line?
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Ponderings for the next issue:
--Beauty Tips for New Moms--Wearing spit up & all things baby with style [online]
--Trust your Inner Mom, No matter how buried she is [subscription only]
--Blogging Mommies (running series) [running series, subscription only]
--Greener Grasses in the Workplace (or not)--Neighbor Mom to the Rescue! [running series, subscription only]

SUBSCRIBE for the full mu. Send a blank e-mail to: mommy_underground-subscribe@yahoogroups.com  ¶ 9:52 PM  

  Who said you can't get something for free? Want to see what the mommy underground is all about? E-mail me [bethany (a) hiitola (dot) come] and I'll send you the first issue for free--no signing up, no subscriptions--just the first ENTIRE newsletter.

Then, maybe, you too will want to join the mommy underground.  ¶ 10:21 AM  

  mu :: vol 1 :: issue 1 :: The Why behind mu Pulling back the Sheepskin: This little idea -- an e-mail newsletter about mothering, being real, and swapping war stories -- isn't new. Nor is it something that is such a brand new concept that others aren't speaking out against the images of super-moms. I can't compete with say, Oprah and Brook Shields teaming up about post-partum depression, nor can I answer your childcare issues. But I can provide a place to read experiences and relate. A wake-up call on my reality of not-so-perfect mothering. Or should I say and expose of the real side of having children (whether you have 1 or 6... or say more. Though I might say you then truly are insane).

mommy underground is an attempt, by me, one lonely little mom and writer, to express MY feelings on motherhood. To share my experiences as a new mom trying to find her way in a community and society where I felt ashamed to say: WHAT THE F*CK IS GOING ON? I just had a baby and you people expect me to be smiling? (And yes I was. Sometimes. Well, maybe once a day.).

I had my son in my room with me from the moment I was born. I chose to breastfeed instead of formula. I picked up my child whenever he cried. I rocked him to sleep at night. I nursed my son until he was well past the two year age limit I let him sleep in my bed (still does), I cried at 5 am when I couldn't get him back to sleep, I went at least a week without showering, and I don't always make my son brush his teeth before bed. Was I judged? Hell yeah! And what did that do for me? It made me miserable. It made me hesitate at every moment to make sure I was doing it 'just right.'

I'd watch moms in malls or restaurants and wonder what the hell I was doing wrong? Why couldn't I keep it in control? Why couldn't I keep a spitting up, high-demand nurser attached to my breast in a someone hidden location but still in public because I needed to do the right thing for the women's rights movement while still being a perfectly happy wife and mom with perfect attendance at all family functions.

All in the 'name' of what? My sanity? We, women in general -- and definitely society and the media -- are SO focused on the idea of the happy, smiling, mom image (and add in any other cliché idea of motherhood and family) that we are forgetting a simple idea (a fundamental one)… June Cleaver was fictional. And so is that idea of motherhood.

mu is (or what I am hoping it will be) is a place to share the REAL of mommying. The spit up in my hair and I am still not washing it till tomorrow real of motherhood. The -- as long as it doesn't have human feces on it -- sure, where the shirt that has been on the floor since Tuesday, I have a life. And it ain't perfect. My goal? To save our sanity as mothers, share our struggles, and sometimes not-so-happy feelings--and help the new generation of moms be better prepared for parenthood.

And please, e-mail me [bethany (a) hiitola (dot) com] if you have your own stories to share. Like what I have to say or hate it -- let me know. And by all means -- if this little newsletter of mine isn't delivering what you wanted it to, let me know. I have high hopes that it will.

Thank you for reading!

-bethany

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What's in Line?
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Ponderings for the next issue:
-- The Toys that keep us Moms Happy (that would be television and other brain-destroying activities we really use to keep our kids occupied) [online]
--The REAL truth about sex after parenthood [subscription only]
--Blogging Mommies [running series, subscription only]
--Greener Grasses in the Workplace (or not) [running series, subscription only]

SUBSCRIBE for the full mu. Send a blank e-mail to: mommy_underground-subscribe@yahoogroups.com  ¶ 6:04 PM