"Mooooo-oooomy"

Saturday, January 23, 2010 by Bethany

The two-syllable word we all hate to here (when said by a 2-year-old) followed by the most hilarious:

"Moooo - ooomy" She whines, "I want your Boooobie!"

(or maybe that was movie?!?)

Either way--hilarious, no?

Labels: kid wittisms, motherhood, The Peanut

The BEST MOMENT EVER

Wednesday, November 04, 2009 by Bethany

Last night about 10:30pm... lying in bed with my daughter.* She's smiling and giggling and being a 2-year-old. Which really, in and of itself is awesome. But it gets better.

She says, "Night, night Mommy." And pats my back. Then leans THIS CLOSE to my face and gives me one of those kisses you just want to remember forever.

Grinning I give her a kiss back. Then she says, "Mooooommmy," very quietly and touches my eyes. That's the sign to close them. And just as I do, I hear even more quiet, "Tinkle, Tinkle, lil star.....how wonder where are......"

I try to peak at her, but get scolded, "Mommy, shhhhhhh. Night time."

And again, with the song (though this time louder), "Tinkle, Tinkle, Lil STAR...." for about 12 times or so.

Maybe it's me, the mom, but hell, I don't remember the last time I was sung to sleep. And it was even better when I nodded off and awoke to that same little girl asleep next to me only a short hour later.

Twinkle, Twinkle Little Start has a whole new place in my heart.

* Don't judge people. I let her stay up after 8pm. We're both happy. It works for us.

Labels: kid wittisms, life, me, parenting, The Peanut

Sit!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009 by Bethany

I've been wondering... is it normal for your 2-year-old to order you to Sit! (and yes Sit! with the exclamation) so that she can do your hair?

Maybe it is a hint that I need something done with the hair. I know it's been over the 6 week recommendation. But so has that nagging dentist appointment. Or annual exam thing. And that hasn't put any fire under my ass to get any of that done.

Well regardless, she's doing a decent job when she's not knotting my bangs in the comb. So I guess I'll let her have the fun. Hell, it's better than taking that call. Or working.

Labels: kid wittisms, life, me, parenting, The Peanut

The Joys of Shower Time with a 2-yr-old

Thursday, September 24, 2009 by Bethany

"I see your butt," she says with a giggle. "I see MY butt." More giggles.

I want to know who let her watch Beavis and Butt-head.

Labels: kid wittisms, parenting, The Peanut

Hospital Conversation*

Tuesday, May 26, 2009 by Bethany

“Mom?”

“Yes honey?”

“Thanks for bringing me here.”

“You’re welcome buddy. Just get well.”

“I will.”

* The Kiddo was admitted to the hospital last Monday. For his asthma. The asthma that comes on with almost every cold. Only this time, it seemed pretty bad. Oxygen. IVs. And this feeling of being such and awful mom. And this conversation? Well, it broke my heart in more ways than one.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Cleaning Room Drama

Wednesday, May 20, 2009 by Bethany

"Keep cleaning? That means I'd clean my room all up!"

Of course Kiddo, that's the idea.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

True Signs the Stress is Showing

Wednesday, April 08, 2009 by Bethany

When you don't want to admit how often your child asks, "Mom are you just tired? Or are you mad at me?"

Labels: kid wittisms, life, me, motherhood bytes

Spring Forward

Tuesday, March 10, 2009 by Bethany

"Mom, if we turn the clock an hour forward, will that mean Spring will come faster?"

I wish.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Comments on Christmas Lane's Light show

Sunday, December 14, 2008 by Bethany

"That guy must have magic to make his house look like THAT!"

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

And then there was love of the first kind

Monday, October 06, 2008 by Bethany

"It's worse than I thought," my son shakes his head and turns 5 shades of red turning away from his new friend--a girlfriend. "She's telling her MOM about me."

I didn't have the heart to tell him, he was now telling ME about her. It really is worse than I thought.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Inisght into a 5-year-old brain

Sunday, September 21, 2008 by Bethany

"I think with magic anything can happen... except flying. You need super powers for that."

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Star Light, Star Bright. First Star I See Tonight...

Monday, July 28, 2008 by Bethany

"If I looked up in the sky right now," my son's eyes twinkled, "and saw a falling star, do you know what I would wish for?"

"What's that?" my husband glances up from the newspaper.

"A bunch of tickles. Raspberries on my belly. And alligators (another version of Raspberries that deal with the stomach, funny noises, fake biting, and a bunch of laughter)."

Giggling, screaming, running, and a bunch of laughter immediately followed. There must have been a falling star somewhere that granted the wish.

Labels: kid wittisms, life, The Husband, The Kiddo

Saturday Night Line Up

Saturday, July 19, 2008 by Bethany

Is it sad that my son sits on the couch after his allotted shows for the evening and discusses home decor design choices with me?

Tonight, he said the red chairs that are there for some color "pop" in the room aren't the right color. He said a dark, chocolate brown might have been better.

He would have chosen House #2--if given the opportunity--because it had a play set in the yard. Though he thought it was too close to the back door. And the pseudo river in the back (that was really a drainage ditch, but I wasn't going to correct him).

Also, he thought that we needed more yellow in our living room. Because it is an accent color. The third one and we barely have it in there. Except for the fake flowers in the corner and small ity bits on the pillows.

What's even worse? I think I agreed with him on almost everything. Except the red chairs. They were damn cool.

Labels: kid wittisms, life, me, parenting, The Kiddo

He has a 6th sense

Tuesday, July 08, 2008 by Bethany

"When I get out of this car, I'm giving you a BIG hug! It's for the M&Ms. And because I think you need one."

You have no idea kiddo how much I needed the M&Ms too! And of course... the hug. Thank you.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

And so it begins

Friday, June 20, 2008 by Bethany

"I kid Mom, I kid."

This from The Kiddo, in reference to a joke he shared with his sister. A private joke. I don't know how much a 5-year-old and almost 10-month-old can share yet, but let me tell you--she found it hilarious.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo, The Peanut

It's a Dirty Job But Someone's Gotta Do It

Saturday, June 14, 2008 by Bethany

"Mom? I need your help," The Kidd calls from the bathroom, "I just went poop and I need you to wipe."

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

The Kiddo Explaining Things to His Baby Sister

Tuesday, April 29, 2008 by Bethany

"... and in museums they hang pictures of DEAD people."

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

When Did the Magic Stop Being Magic

Sunday, April 06, 2008 by Bethany

Last week I found myself in a disappointing conversation with The Kiddo. Apparently, Super Heroes don't exist. "Mo-om! They aren't real," he laughs as if I'd been hideously childish for a thirty-something year old.

Damn. I was hoping I could get a hold of Wonder Woman. She's got great, think, lustrous hair. I wanted her secret for such great looking locks. Not to mention Hawk Girl's biceps (or abs). There must be some girl super hero work out that can help with the waist line... dontcha think?

Honestly, I was thinking this conversation wouldn't happen until he was eight. Or maybe eighteen. Losing the magic in childhood is just plain disappointing. And there is too many magic-less parts about being an adult. Keeping the super heroes alive, meant he was still dreaming big thoughts. Reality set in--and all the crap that goes along with it.

Then again, maybe it's just the realization that we can't fly like Superman. Because, you know, The Chipmunks (Alvin--his favorite, Simon, and Theodore ) are real. They have CD of their music out to buy (and "Mom, I really, really, really want it. I know all the words!"). Didn't I know?

I'm thinking this calls for the JLB (Justice League Band) to hit the streets pronto. Seeing Batman front and center could call for a girls' night out in my book. And anything would be better than that high-pitched singing. It hasn't gotten any better than it was in the 80s.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Guaranteed to Never Lose

Monday, March 03, 2008 by Bethany

"Mom! Look, I'm making every character Darth Vader*."

The Kiddo points to the television. It's got the Wii Sports Tennis set-up screen waiting for input. The Miis on my son's team are conveniently Darth Vader and so is the other doubles team.

"Now if I win as me, then I win. If the other team wins. Well, I win too. Darth always wins!"

Nice reasoning. I tend to want to stack these odds myself most days.

*There is this fun little thing on the Wii where people with a ton more time and creative skills than I create "famous" Miis. This is where we pimped Mr. Vader. And Batman. Charlie Brown. Hello Kitty... and a handful of others. Made my son's day. Except of course, there is no cape on Darth or Batman. Here that Nintendo? Get your act together.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Kisses, Mothers, & All Things Nice

Friday, February 22, 2008 by Bethany

I snuck a kiss on my son's cheek this afternoon while he was engrossed in an afternoon viewing of Wow! Wow! Wubzzy! and he instantly grinned.

"I'll take those while I can," I mused more to myself than The Kiddo.

He looked puzzled.

I chuckled and pulled him onto my lap--thankful I could still do that with my 5-years-old. His lanky tall frame still let me hold my first "baby" and I'd take that chance every time I got. Time was running short.

"When you get older, you'll probably not want me to do that anymore," I shared remembering that I was about 9 when my dad planted a kiss on my cheek and I blushed. My pre-pubescent friends were over and for some reason I felt childish. Yeah. At 9. Imagine that.

"Why not? Moms are supposed to kiss their kids." His eyes were wide and doe looking. He was clearly perplexed.

"We sure are," I kissed him again, "But when you get older you might be embarrassed that I would give you kisses."

He shook his head no and I laughed. Again.

"But I'll always want your kisses Mom. They make me feel warm inside."

"Me too," was all I could muster before giving him yet another kiss on his cheek. I'd say I have another two years at tops. I figure this conversation is one to keep for prosperity. And to look back on with a glass of wine and a few tears.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Preschool Charmer

Thursday, February 14, 2008 by Bethany

Watch out ladies, here comes The Kiddo! He's been planning and drawing and coloring and stickering, and making sure his Valentine's are just right, just for you. And the other 12 boys in his class.

Nope, he doesn't discriminate when it comes to the perfect Valentine's Day card. Or apparently skipping over this holiday. Hallmark (or commercial) made, he doesn't care. He's all about showing his love. So, don't ruin it for him. I think it's cute. I've gotten 4 cards already this morning. And you bet your bottom, I'm saving every one for when he's 16 and wooing the girl next door.

Labels: holiday, kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Tell me this doesn't break your heart into a million pieces

Tuesday, February 12, 2008 by Bethany

Last night I was asleep. Deep sleep. As in, dark everywhere, deep breathing, no one awake in the house but our one cat who's the night owl. Sleeping, dreaming... until, I felt a small hand patting my cheek. Oblivious, I probably kept sleeping, but the warm hand kept petting my cheek over and over (and over again). Finally, I stirred enough to wake. But only to lift one eyelid.

I am looking straight into my almost 6-month-old daughter's face. She's grinning.

Her little hand, moves from my face and begins patting my chest. This is the baby sign to nurse. So we do. No sooner does she finish up, she falls back asleep.

She's a smart one isn't she?

Labels: kid wittisms, The Peanut

Nothin' but a Sleep Thang

Thursday, January 31, 2008 by Bethany

On less than four hours of sleep, there are few things that amuse me. But, my 5-year-old son dancing naked in my bathroom, humming some made up song, while brushing his teeth... um, yeah. That would do it.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

Either that is a Shoe Store in my Closet or I have too many shoes

Thursday, January 03, 2008 by Bethany

This morning, while waking the children for the beginning of Bringing First Child to Pre-School and Getting My Ass Back into the Swing of What we Call Working from Home with Second Child, we had a little fun. Or should I say, The Kiddo had some fun.

"Mom! Mom! Look! There is a Shoe Store behind you!"

Grinning, I take a sly look over my shoulder, "There is?"

"Gotcha!" He scrambles off the bed to get dressed.

I think I own too many shoes.

Labels: fun, kid wittisms

You Break My Heart

Monday, December 17, 2007 by Bethany

Ways in which my son told me he was disappointed that we could not attend his holiday singing extravaganza on Friday when The Peanut fell ill with a nasty virus:

ran off to his room, shut the door, and wailed almost louder than the sick infant that I was patting and rocking on my shoulder
tore up approximately 10 sheets of paper with drawn hearts on them. To illustrate that I was breaking his heart. This "breaking apart" demonstration, of course, was done right in front of me with a little flare on the tearing part.
when mom (as in me), was becoming more and more visibly unresponsive to the breaking of the hearts on paper, he switched to drawing these same hearts on his Leapfrog screen and Xing the hearts out.
And then he added in pictures of himself crying
Or stick figures with Xs.
Any other combination of the above, with sad, droopy, and teary face

Yes, all of these forms of expression did break my heart into pieces. Particularly the tearing of the hearts. And especially since by then I'd had a feverish 3-month old wailing on my shoulder for over 3 hours that was completely and utterly inconsolable.

Labels: kid wittisms, parenting, The Kiddo

All of the Remembers

Sunday, October 28, 2007 by Bethany

"Do you have remembers Mom? Like when we went to Grandma and Grandpa's house last year for Halloween. I have great remembers."

I think he means memories. But I am thinking "remembers" are definitely more memorable.

Labels: kid wittisms, The Kiddo

12 Words a Mom Just Loves to Hear (MB #3)

Wednesday, October 24, 2007 by Bethany

"My tummy hurts. I feel like I am going to throw up."

Labels: kid wittisms, motherhood, motherhood bytes, parenting

Kid Wittism (to Unborn Babe)

Wednesday, August 08, 2007 by Bethany

"Mom, the baby likes soft voices. Ones that say I love you."

In a hushed tone, "I love you baby sister."

I melted somewhere between 'baby' and 'love.' How 'bout you?

Labels: baby, kid wittisms

Deep Breaths and Cheap Thoughts

Wednesday, August 01, 2007 by Bethany

Or maybe not so much. There will at least be thoughts. My Weekend, in bullets.

Had a fabulous Friday. Honestly. Who can say they went to see Toad the Wet Sprocket at the Lincoln Park Zoo when they are 8 months pregnant? Me, that's who! And if it weren't for my ever-protruding belly and swelling ankles (and citing at least 4 other expecting mothers within eyesight) in the 2 hours we were there, I'd think I was back in college enjoying the limelight of my life. Seriously. It was great fun. Glenn Phillips "opening" for Toad and cool weather from the lake, well, I was in a bit of a delirious haze of "living the dream of my life."

Until the chic to the right of us decided to screen incessantly about her attendance at 12 concerts in her lifetime and number 1 fan status. And the fact that in Houston when she saw Toad the Wet Sprocket play she could name each song within the first chord. And then proceeded to attempt doing the same here... only now 12 years later. Disturbing the entire crowd around her--and the poor man sitting in a lawn chair right beneath her bellowing voice. I mean, the rest of us were there to enjoy the concert.

At least until the guy in front of us got all huffy for our singing voices. See, he paid full price for tickets (like we did) to hear Toad (well spent). Only he thought it a better use of his time to stand up and read the latest (and final) Harry Potter installment--obstructing the entire back third of the audiences' view. you know, so he could squint in the small street lamp light and read. DURING a concert. To which... well, I don't know. If you're going to take a novel to a concert, you might want to sit somewhere out of the way, while the rest of us enjoy the show. That's why we bought tickets right?
Philosophizing with my son is one my favorite things to do right now. Did you know that a 4 and a half year old can ask questions that floor you? Because, let me tell you, my kid is a genius. Or at least curious. Latest comments for your enjoyment:

"The baby does NOT eat food through its belly button. That is just silly."

"If I didn't exist before I was born, why am I here? I didn't ask to exist."

"Having a baby is hard work. I can't do anything because Mom can't do anything."

"After I'm done with college, please don't make me leave home. I like home. I want to always stay here."
Making breakfast at Noon. The story of my weekends lately. Can you believe my kid can actually get his own Trix cereal from the pantry and pour himself some milk? I must truly be the laziest parent on the planet right now.
Spending Sunday in my pajamas and babysitting? Well the pajama part was fabulous. In fact, I think I need to make it a ritual. The babysitting not so much. Though worked enough for me once I got the 18 month old to sleep. The husband took our kiddo and the other to the park for an hour. So I had an hour to myself. Which, again, takes the cake.

Another weekend, another week. And now another day. If only every weekend was so eventful. Or maybe not. This baby I'm carrying is getting a bit heavy.

Labels: kid wittisms, life, pregnancy

No Baby Talk

Monday, May 21, 2007 by Bethany

"I don't want you to have the baby mom."

What? Did my beloved child just dis the coming child? Oh. My. God. I think my heart just plummeted below the pit of my stomach into the dire straights of my callused heels.

"Why?" Honestly, it was all I could udder/choke/cry before I searched the house for someone else to hear the answer.

"Because you can't go on carnival rides with me. And I want you to go on the roller coasters and spinning rides. The baby won't let you. And that makes me mad."

And it makes me want to laugh. Almost. Until I realize how serious this is for the kiddo. Fun, toys, rides, carnivals, and friends are his life. One that I had to tell him I couldn't join this weekend because of the baby. And all you parents out there know--when the new little one does join us, well, I'll be saying that statement again. I am sure. And boy--it is going to kill some of the good vibes for the kiddo isn't it?

Labels: kid wittisms, motherhood, parenting

Crack me up Wednesday

Wednesday, May 16, 2007 by Bethany

"I need my drum! I need my drum!"
...
...

"My foot fell asleep and I need to wake it up."

Labels: kid wittisms

Just what you want to hear while on a conference call

Monday, April 23, 2007 by Bethany

"Mom, can you check this itchy spot on my butt?"

Labels: day job, kid wittisms, motherhood

Playin' Hooky

Monday, March 26, 2007 by Bethany

Can you play hooky from work? Would it be as much fun? I mean, somehow, calling in for a personal day on the morning of, still doesn't seem as fun as faking it, does it?

Labels: kid wittisms, life

Who knew?

Monday, March 12, 2007 by Bethany

"I broke my skeleton," the kid flops out his right arm as if someone had removed it from the shoulder socket, "See? It doesn't work anymore."

Stifling laughter for a bit of sincerity I ask, "What happened?"

"The video game. It really broke my arm. And I can't use it anymore."

Now normally his sobbing would have me heartbroken. This time, I had to do everything in my power to maintain control over my ever-increasing urge to laugh.

Video games can break arms--or skeletons--who knew?

Labels: kid wittisms, motherhood

Reminicing

Thursday, January 18, 2007 by Bethany

"I had a snow fight with the fence today."
"At school?"
"Yup."

"Who won?"

"The fence."

Labels: kid wittisms

Kid Wittisms

Wednesday, May 24, 2006 by Bethany

The kid's catching on to the whole idle chit chat. And I'm not so sure it is a good thing. Take a look for yourself:

"Mom?"

"Yeah, honey?"

"What did you do at work t'day?"

"Talked to a bunch of people on the phone."

"Didju like them?"

"Suuure." Where is he really going with this?

"Didju do anythin' else?"

"I finished writing a book--something called a user guide--and sent it to some of those people on the phone."

"On your 'puter?"

What is this kid? Some sort of corporate spawn?

"Yes. Using something called e-mail."

"Was it fun?"

"If you want to call it that sure."

Kid ponders for a moment.

"How 'bout meeting. Didju have meeting?"

"Yes. I did actually. Two of them."

He nods quickly, "I like meeting. I meet friends at school every day."

Yeah. If he only knew.

Labels: kid wittisms

"Mooooo-oooomy"

The BEST MOMENT EVER

Sit!

The Joys of Shower Time with a 2-yr-old

Hospital Conversation*

Cleaning Room Drama

True Signs the Stress is Showing

Spring Forward

Comments on Christmas Lane's Light show

And then there was love of the first kind

Inisght into a 5-year-old brain

Star Light, Star Bright. First Star I See Tonight...

Saturday Night Line Up

He has a 6th sense

And so it begins

It's a Dirty Job But Someone's Gotta Do It

The Kiddo Explaining Things to His Baby Sister

When Did the Magic Stop Being Magic

Guaranteed to Never Lose

Kisses, Mothers, & All Things Nice

Preschool Charmer

Tell me this doesn't break your heart into a million pieces

Nothin' but a Sleep Thang

Either that is a Shoe Store in my Closet or I have too many shoes

You Break My Heart

All of the Remembers

12 Words a Mom Just Loves to Hear (MB #3)

Kid Wittism (to Unborn Babe)

Deep Breaths and Cheap Thoughts

No Baby Talk

Crack me up Wednesday

Just what you want to hear while on a conference call

Playin' Hooky

Who knew?

Reminicing

Kid Wittisms

bethany hiitola

Categories

Recent Posts

Archives

Twitter Updates