Review Time: THE NO-CRY DISCIPLINE SOLUTION by Elizabeth Pantley*
I'm a parent (duh!). And if you are a parent and haven't heard of Elizabeth Pantley... well, you are missing out on some valuable, gentle, parenting advice.Now I know what you are thinking. Another parental advice book? Another book about telling me how I am doing this whole sleep/eating/discipline/learning thing wrong (or right)? Well, not really. Elizabeth, for one, is a parent. Yep, 4 kids. And you know what, she writes from experience. And her experiences, are very much like what you or I have experienced. From those, she then offers advice--mom-to-mom (parent-to-parent) about how to deal with children from infants on up.
I first heard of Elizabeth way back when my Kiddo was about 6 months old. He loved to sleep in our bed. Nurse some more and then sleep back in our bed. And then wake up and want to be back in our bed. Every hour and a half all night long. I think I had 20 minutes of sleep time between feedings and holdings and I was on the edge of losing it. And wondering where I had gone wrong in my young parenting skills. Seriously. I was thinking that this parenting thing was for the birds, and I was going to throw in the towel about my child EVER spending one night in his own bedroom. Hell, I was ready to deal with it until he was 18 years old if I had to--just give me a full night of sleep (or at least 4 hours)!
That is exactly when I landed upon Elizabeth's first book, THE NO CRY SLEEP SOLUTION, Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night. The book saved my life. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that it solved every sleep issue The Kiddo (and I) had, but it did solve the biggest of the issues. And it definitely made me feel better about my parenting choices. Want to know why? Elizabeth's voice, concern, honestly--and well basic understanding of what I wanted to do as a parent. Which brings me to today's review. Her latest treasure of a book-- THE NO-CRY DISCIPLINE SOLUTION, Gentle Ways to Encourage Good Behavior Without Whining, Tantrums & Tears.
As with her first book, this one also takes the GENTLE approach. The guidance, kind, and patient approach to working with one's child to change a behavior. THE reason I love Elizabeth's books so much. And what perfect timing--my son had joined the ranks of a 4-year old. Past infant, past toddler, and almost school age!
Before I dig into the content, let's talk a little about research. Elizabeth is relentless--in that she works with what she calls "test mommies and daddies." These are a core group of parents that she talks with, surveys, provides concrete methods to test, and then surveys again, e-mails/calls, communications, and basically tests every little suggestion she writes about. You know, to see if it works. And this book is no different. In fact, she had over 200 families in this round, across the world. The whole 202 girl count versus 209 boys, twins, toddlers, preschoolers, school aged, you name it. And guess what, she knows them all intimately by name. And that is why I, again, love the books. She takes the successes (and difficulties) personally and it show is the way she writes her books.
What did I love most about the NO-CRY DISCIPLINE BOOK? A lot. Here's a smidgen:
- Father/Mother-Speak call outs. Love these! They are "real" quotes from dads and moms about their experiences. You know the ones--quotes we find our heads shaking yes (or no) to because we relate on so many levels we could say them ourselves.
- The idea to look at the BIG picture of raising a child, not all the details, trivial matters, and well all the day to day stuff. This is all over in the book. The idea that what we do today will in turn help us tomorrow. And that all the details of day to day life that might stress us out, well, that is normal, but not what we should focus on.
- REAL solutions, I can take away from the book and bring into my real life and USE. Whether it is a suggestion to make play time out of chores, diaper changes, or behavioral talk back-or actual solutions to sleepiness and constant crankiness. And these aren't just one time, one possible solutions--these are a bunch of options to choose from.
- Reminders. Charts. Key Points. Worksheets. Surveys. All the concrete stuff that I will pick up again and again. Not that I am going to keep this book on the bedside table forever (then again with a newborn in the house, I might need that much constant reminding)--but it is definitely something I will refer back to. Or recommend to friends. The information, though sometimes common sense, is well informed and definitely something when thrown into parenthood (and bad days) that one needs to remember and freshen up on after a long day of parenting work.
- A fresh perspective on Anger. Yep. We all deal with it as parents. Whether we are really truly angry with our child (it happens), or more commonly, when we are angry about something else and it gets directed at your child (admit it, we've all done this. Unfortunately). There is a whole section on this that I read (Part 3, A Peaceful Home: Staying Calm and Avoiding Anger). And reread. And found myself nodding. Tearful. And completely understanding that I have as much a part of this anger thing as my Kiddo does.
I know, I know. You are a parent and don't have a lot of time to read. But guess what? This book is broken into easy to read, FAST sections. Take a look at the table of contents, find what is relevant to you and READ it. 15 minutes of time (at most). I swear. It will be well worth you time. Elizabeth's easy to read, down to earth advice will hit home. And make you think you have known her and her family since--well, forever. And she's a girlfriend sharing a parent secret you never knew.
Want to know more?
- Buy the book here at Amazon.
- Visit Elizabeth Pantley's web site (FULL of information, additional materials, excerpts, etc for ALL her books).
- Read the following excerpts from the book:
» Hitting, Kicking, Biting and Hair Pulling- Read Elizabeth's Bio here.
» Interrupting
» Tantrums, Fussing and Whining
» What Triggers Your Anger?
» Banish Common Parenting Myths
- Need Advice about sleeping patterns of your children, discipline, or baby care? She's got an entire portion of her web site dedicated to helping you. Check it out here.
- You can even join her mailing lists! She's got many, chalked full of information (really). See what's available and how you can sign up here.
Hope you enjoy the book as much as I do. And, well, see you in the parenthood universe. We're in it together!
* Elizabeth herself asked me if I wanted to get a free copy of her book to review. Of course, I said yes! I'd already purchased her first book way back when (3 years ago or so)... and expected the same down to earth and REAL advice in this book. I was right. And clearly wanted to share my excitement about her book with all of you too! And Elizabeth is just as kind in person (well via e-mail) as she is in the book.
Labels: blog tour, books, motherhood, parenting, reviews
